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5 Tips for Mediation During Divorce

By Mary Stearns-Montgomery | Dec 20, 2011 | Divorce
 

Many individuals decide to do mediation rather than settling their divorce through court. One must understand the point of mediation is to resolve the divorce quickly and cordially instead of battling things out in court. In order to make your mediation as successful as possible we have put together 5 tips for you to follow during the process.

  • Do not give ultimatums: By giving ultimatums to your ex spouse during mediation you can ruin any progress that has been made and can stop the process of resolving the dispute.
  • Make the first move to settle: Some may feel that if they show eagerness to settle or resolve an issue then they look weak to their ex. Taking the first step actually shows confidence and can help move a settlement along instead of waiting around for each other to do something about it.
  • Don’t negotiate backwards: Sometimes during the negotiation process one spouse may have a change of heart or discover something new and may try to back out of a deal or pull back their offer. Negotiating backwards is only harming you and your ability to move forward and make a settlement and is not in good faith.
  • Consider ALL proposals: Don’t overreact if on the first go around a proposal you get from you ex is nowhere near where you want it to be. Think of it as a starting point and build from there to get to where you would like to be. All together refusing the proposal and getting angry is only hurting the settlement process from moving forward.
  • Be cordial: The negotiation process will go much smoother if you are able to be cordial to your ex during the mediation process. Many assume their attorney needs to be nasty to in order to win, but this isn’t the case. Often times your attorney will be friendly and cordial to your ex and their attorney but this doesn’t mean your attorney isn’t on your side. Remember your attorney has done this before and it is important to trust them and take their advice.

Mediation is often a successful option for many couples settling a divorce if done right. Talk to your family law attorney before you begin the mediation process to be properly prepared .

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