- by Mary Stearns-Montgomery
- in Divorce
Many couples decide to settle their divorce through mediation or a collaborative process rather than through a court trial. For those couples we have put together the top six things to keep in mind during negotiations in order to reach the desired outcome for both parties.
- Do your homework: In order to come to an agreement and to live with your settlement you need to be prepared before you meet. If you aren’t clear about the other parties assets or income, you are not going to be able to make a reasoned decision.
- Forget the past: In many cases one spouse or the other was betrayed or hurt during the marriage. In order to successful settle your divorce and move on you must not focus on the betrayal but the future.
- Work with your ex: While it may be difficult to see your ex as a partner during this time it is important to continue to work with your ex to solve any issues that may arise during the divorce process.
- Be creative: Staying open and thinking outside the box during your divorce process can help solve conflict in a positive way.
- Keep moving forward: Don’t get caught up in any petty arguments during your divorce process. The whole point of mediation and collaborative divorce is to be able to settle your divorce in a more positive way. Only talk about things that are going to help you and your ex move forward in the divorce process.
- 6. Don’t speak for your ex: During negotiations don’t assume your ex’s feelings or make accusations. Only speak for yourself and how you are feeling and let your ex do the same in order to come to a reasonable agreement.
The bottom line during divorce negotiations is to reach a desired outcome for both parties involved and to settle the divorce in a respectful, timely manner. If you are considering alternative methods to divorce other than court speak to a divorce attorney to understand all your options.